What child are you? 1st? Last? Well, if you are anything but the middle child, you are out of luck. Appearantly they are the most powerful and many  of them don’t even know it. So we decided to have Catherine Salmon PhD from the University of Redlands has co-authored a book entitled, “The Secret Power of Middle Children: How Middleborns Can Harness Their Unexpected and Remarkable Abilities”

We will bust the Middle Child Myth. We will find out why middle children are brilliant negotiators, trail blazers and justice seekers while we will also discover how to parent them.

Are you and your spouse the same or is one a 1st child and the other something different? Does it lead to issues between the two of you? It does for Laura and Todd. That’s why we are all excited about this conversation. Don’t miss it LIVE on Wednesday at 2pm, pst.

As parents we are always looking for resources that can help us in situation with our children. Here on Parenting Unplugged we have provided many of those through conversations and through wonderful experts we have interviewed on the show. We spend the time searching these out for all of you and now I have found that much of it has been a waste of time. If I had just listened to the radio more I could have saved myself thousands of hours.

I discovered this morning that one of the best ways to get my kids to stop punching, hitting or yelling at each other is… music. Not just any music. We are talking Dynamite. We are talking Taio Cruz.  Everything was going fine and then for some reason my 7 and 4 year old started griping and going at one another. I could have sat down, talked with them, discussed their feelings and such, but I was late. I had to get them in the car and get to school. So, I immediately turned on the radio, because honestly music soothes me quite often. I was quickly moving around the dial to find something I liked and the boys are ramping up the intensity of their confrontation. Then BOOM!

“I throw my hands up in the air some times, saying  ay-oh. Gotta let go.

I want to celebrate and live my life saying ay-oh, baby let’s go

Cause we gonna rock this club, we gonna go all night, we gonna light this up like its dynamite.

Cause I told you once and I told you twice, we gonna light up like it’s dynamite.”

Ok, so they aren’t the best written words ever, but when the music started pumping and the bys heard it, their eyes shifted to the front of the car, “Wait, we love that song!” I noticed they both said, “We”. That was nice. Then they both started singing, one in tune and the other spoke about every third or fourth word. That didn’t matter. What was great was that music brought them together. School is only 3 or 4 minutes away, so as we pulled up and the song had just ended, the older one, Connor age 7, says to Drew, “I love you Drew. I’ll see you after school.” To which the 4 year old Drew yelled back, “I love you too Connor! Bye!”

Some parents are scared of the lyrics that are out there and what it is teaching our kids. That’s a posting for another day. Trust me. I have a story about that too.

Now that we have been here one week, it’s time to share our observations on these three topics. Well, not exactly.

Poop: You may have read about this story on our Facebook page. If not, the saga of a road trip turned into hell and back is smack dab in the middle of this episode and yes it involves. Poop.

Parenting: We were trying to record this show while our children were trying to play nicely. That didn’t last and while Todd did edit out the moments they broke in, we did get the chance to talk about it. Laura explained how she handled one situation and then when Todd handled a similar situation the same way a little bit later, she procalimed, “Well, I would have handled it this way.” Did Todd lose his cool? We don’t hold anything from you on this show.

Sibling Rivalries are something we are locked in right now. Connor (7) and Drew(4) play well well but right now we are 50/50 fun and fighting. It’s driving us both insane.

We did have some wonderful resources to talk about on the Big Island. Our trip to the Sea Horse farm, our venture to Akaka Falls (it says it’s $1 to get it. We didn’t see any of that. It was free) and the Seafood Watch info from the Monterrey Bay Aquarium. It’s all good and it’s all in this episode.

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Todd Williamson of OmBase Yoga stopped in for his monthly visit.

Do you ever feel as though your life is just a carrot at the end of a long stick that you are holding? Drop it!

What about when your spouse changes over the years and you are not really changing at the same speed? How do each of you handle that? Todd and Laura were able to bring up their own conversation, because that’s happening right now.

Check out some of Todd’s classes at http://ombase.org

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Ok, Laura and I have had many guests on our show and they have delivered fabulous resources for any parent in any situation, but today trumped them all. Being a conscious parent is not something that we can decide to do over a bowl of Cheerios, but it is something we can decide to be. How we act and how we react have nothing to do with what is happening around us, it is becuase of what is happening within us. If we are able to learn those lessons, you are moving towards being the parent we all want to be.

Spend a few minutes with Dr Shefali Tsabary and her book, The Conscious Parent and you will feel yourself and your approach change. Laura and I are not saying anyone is right or wrong int he way they parent, but we are saying let’s all strive to be the best we can. Did our parents do that? Maybe. If they didn’t, don’t you owe it to your kids to be the best?

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Time to meet the newest members of the Pagatim.fm family, Ba and Josette Luvmour, who will bring over 30 years of therapy experience to the table every week. Their new show Luvmour Family Relationships is all about helping parents connect on a level never experienced before. Kids are changing changing day to day and to know what they are becoming and what influences them is an invaluable tool. Put on your hard hats, it’s time to learn from two of the very best on Parenting Unplugged Radio.

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It’s never easy to handle teens and all that they do, but Dr. Kathy Masarie has some great ideas and tips on how we can all create a relationship with our own teens that will allow us to keep them safe and ourselves sane. She has been through it herself and shares her experiences and talks about others’ who have struggled. It’s time to make this an easier journey.

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Are you preparing for childbirth, or struggling with your kids now? Looking for help? Denise Rennekamp, the Parenting Ed. Program Coordinator at Oregon State University joined Todd and Laura and talked about all of the great parenting programs that are in Oregon. We can never get too much information. It only helps us make the right choice.

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Was your weekend smooth or jagged? Laura reflected on what she felt was a Village Manner weekend. Todd watched college football. Was it too much screen time for the kids or was it good for them? Laura shared scary statistics about kids and tv but also great resources from Kathy Masarie MD that will help keep them on the right path.

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